STORMY JULY

I just wanted to let go of all that I was feeling, to express my inner-self instead of continuing to bury my emotions. Heavy body acrylic paints, ink, special materials and a roller were scattered over the canvas, I then just started to feel my way into the work and let go of what was being held so tightly inside.

For the whole month I had a wire sticking out of my back, attached to a battery which was strapped around my waist... waiting to see if stage 1 of the sacral neuromodulation device surgery was successful enough to warrant the stage 2 surgery in August, four days before my 21st birthday. And if the emotional impact of this wasn't enough, the person who had made the promises of the heart to me, wasn't able to actually be my person, instead of being honest with me, he strung me along until I "got better". But better is subjective, I was only then discovering the depths of my physical pain had started from birth, and now the emotional layers were beginning to pile up. I could not imaging how opening this door of creative exploration was the start of the storm to come.